21 February 2011

New Year Resolutions

I read a lot of blogs. I love them. As 2010 became 2011, I read many bloggers' goals, aspirations, and resolutions for the new year. And so I'm going to share mine with you.

What's that you say? It's three weeks into February? Yeah, I know. Hey, everybody's biggest resolution failed on Superbowl Sunday a few weeks ago, so that's all starting over again anyway, right?

Here are the resolutions I made at the end of December:

1. Lay on the couch as much as possible.
2. Let my children feed themselves apples from the fridge and cold dry cereal from the cupboard. All day.
3. Let my husband wash every dirty dish that touches the kitchen sink.
4. Shower . . . sometimes.
5. Don't throw up.

Oh, wait. I forgot one.

6. Grow a baby.

Did I forget to tell you I'm expecting our third? Oh, well, now you know.

Either I've forgotten how hard that first trimester is, or it really is worse this time around. But I gotta tell ya: these last couple of months have been a doozy for me. I've stayed away from blogging because of total lack of energy.

But I've also stayed away because blogging is supposed to be about sharing the very best parts of my life with you. It's about showing you all the great things I do, and how put together I am, and how I always behave completely up to my ideals.

And then I got the 1500-hour stomach bug. And the person I want you to see when you read my blog (that woman who always feeds her family whole foods and keeps her home in perfect working order), well, she's just nowhere to be found, is she?

Now that I'm starting to feel better and get my energy back, I've also had to face the fact that I judge too quickly. Once something first becomes important to me (something stupid like keeping my bathroom clean at all times), I can't understand why another person doesn't follow my new philosophy with the same enthusiasm. But now I know why: SHE DOESN'T FEEL GOOD! I hope that's what people thought about me, my home, and my children for the last two months. "Oh, it looks like she hasn't swept her floor for six weeks, but I'm sure it's because she isn't feeling well."

So, it's out in the open now. I'm having a baby. And I'm not perfect. Come see the 18 boxes of cereal in my kitchen if you don't believe it.

And my real resolution this year? Stop judging. Assume that she's not sleeping well, or her kids aren't sleeping well, or a million different things are going on that prevent her life from being picture-perfect, or blog-perfect, as the new standard seems to be. Smile at her instead. Say hello. Maybe even offer to have her and her kids over for a bowl of Cheerios.


  1. CONGRATS!! We're both expecting our third babies together! And I am totally with you, my friend. This first trimester has really kicked my butt. I hope it's settling down for you ... I start my second trimester in the next few weeks and am hoping to be done with the ick. And don't sweat projecting your perfect imperfections! :o) It's what we bloggers do.

  2. As I always say, pregnancy is no picnic. Sorry it's been so rough!

    I love this post; I am the same way, so this is a good reminder to me. And it makes me feel better to know I'm not the only one who doesn't have it all together all the time!

  3. Congratulations! I remember the whole 'all day' sickness that lasted a full 4 months. For a clean freak like myself it was torture not to be able to scour my house top to bottom. But once that energy kicked in, it was 'outta my way!'. I'm glad you're feeling better and with two little ones, they'd probably be right behind you taking everything out again so just go with the flow. And I would definitely invite you over for cereal but it may not be Cheerios unless they were on sale and I had a coupon. Right now, I have lots of Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Chex. It's like a party AND dessert! ;-)

    Blog when you can, we'll still be here.

    Sara from Saving For Someday

  4. Congrats on your pregnancy! I am happy for you.

    P.S. Do you remember this post I wrote about morning sickness remedies? I had it BAD for both of my pregnancies: http://metropolitanmama.net/2010/09/morning-sickness-remedies-for-emesis-gravidarum/


  5. Hi. First of all, congrats on your pregnancy.

    Second, thank you.

    I found your blog tonight after my husband fell asleep at 7pm, because he hasn't slept more than 5 hours/night in 3 weeks. And so I googled something like "fed-up wife of grad student". Nothing came up, but when I left out the "fed-up" part, your blog came up!!

    My husband is in year 4 of a 6-year PhD program, we have two kids, and I stay at home (sounds familiar, right!). Most of the time, I have the right perspective. I'm glad my husband can follow his dream. I'm grateful that we still have more than many people in the world. And I'm glad that there should be a decent job on the other end of this.

    And some nights, I'm just SO DONE WITH IT ALL. Not so much the money (which sucks), but the fact that I feel like the school owns us. But your blog gave me some laughs (thanks Simpsons!), some reassurance, and some reminders that other people are going through this and it's going to be OK.

    And I might go try making my own shampoo tomorrow...